Stress and details. Details and stressssss!

Oh my. The last few days have just been filled with ups and downs. Valley's & mountain top's if you will. When I have the valley moment's I just drive myself insane and then wonder if I'm making any of the right decisions at all. Am I? I don't even know. But I am getting on the plane and flying over the big bad ocean and placing myself in a land I hardly know for 6 months.

Of course the mountain top moments are fantastic. I can see the future and it's exciting and fun. I'm filled with hope. I see all the possibilities that lie ahead and I just lose my ever loving mind!

I hate what a little self doubt does to my mind and spirit. It literally comes up from behind me and takes me out at the knees. Stupid satan. My mind is already swirling around like a bad Wizard of Oz spoof and then satan sticks his big ugly head right in the middle of it all. C'mon already! I want one day where I can shut my thoughts out and be without thinking of all the things that I have to get done in the next 37 days. It's too much right now and I know that I need to curl up with Jesus and just rest in him but I can't even get my mind to calm down enough to do that. Drugs. I need drugs and lots of 'em people. I need Jesus and drugs and maybe some fuzzy slippers.

At least I still have a sense of humor in all of this or I would be a giant ball of mess on the floor in all my drama and ice cream. Oh! ice cream. That would make it all better. All is right in the world again! Thank you Jesus for cows who gave us ice cream!!!! AMEN!